ideas (thoughtful and less so)

I’ve been immersed in the college applications process. I’ve been writing essays about why I want to go to each of the colleges on my list. I’ve been writing essays about how I fit into their missions and communities. I’ve been writing essays about my life experiences. I’ve been filling out my biographical information and talking about my extracurricular activities. I’ve been requesting and mailing my school transcripts and teacher recommendations. I’ve been paying application fees, which are certainly adding up. I even made a trip up to Washington, DC to visit some schools (and decided to apply to George Washington University). I’ve been working hard in school to try and improve my chances of actually being accepted into some of the schools I love.

And, yes, I love every one of the schools I’m applying to, even though my application list is far too long. I would be thrilled to go to any of them. Money, I think, will be the deciding factor. And that makes me sad. Money has too much control over our lives. Money will be deciding where I spend the next four years of my life. My parents are a little reluctant to contribute to my college education. They’re not paying my application fees, and they won’t give as much as the government will say they should be able to towards my tuition, not by a long shot. I’m not sure what I’ll do next year if some college or another doesn’t offer me a very nice scholarship.

I’m worried. I’m worried about the fact that my future is not in my control anymore. It’s in the hands of admissions committees and financial aid offices. I believe that I would be an asset to any of these schools; I’m just not sure how to make them believe it enough.

Wish me luck, and luck to all those going through this process with me!